To My Dad and My Husband (and all of those that Show Up When it Counts) on Father’s Day
A lot of people say that a woman chooses a husband a lot like her Dad.
On the surface, that’s not true for me. My hubby and my Dad are very different. While my husband is more reserved and serious, my Dad is a goofball at heart who loves to chat.
On the deeper side though, it’s absolutely true. It’s a little hard for me to put into words, but here’s the best way I can explain it: they show up for me.
The earliest and most vivid memory I have of my Dad showing up for me was in Middle School. I think it was 7th grade, and I was being inducted into my school’s National Junior Honor Society.
The ceremony was scheduled for a weekday evening. Unfortunately, my Dad had a major business trip scheduled for that same week in North Carolina. I was bummed that he wouldn’t be able to come, but I understood why he couldn’t.
On the night of the ceremony, I was all dressed up (90s poofy, awkward middle school hair and all). Along with a lot of other kids, we were inducted into the Society. I didn’t do anything special during the event—I think I sat up on stage most of the time in a sea of other awkward middle school kids.
But when I looked out from the stage, to my surprise, I saw my Dad in the audience—with a beaming smile and proud eyes.
After the ceremony, I ran up to him and hugged him and thanked him for coming. To this day, I don’t know how he pulled it off. It was at least a ten hour drive, and I’m pretty sure he went back to North Carolina after the ceremony.
But he was there for me, even when he didn’t have to be. And I’ll never forget it.
Now, he shows up for me in different ways. Who scrubbed my bathrooms and helped my Mom make freezer meals after I had my daughter? Who sends me funny texts and pictures on random Tuesdays? Who still brings me flowers sometimes? Who always picks up the phone when I call, even if he’s having a rough week? Who makes regular voyages out to Chicago to see me and my family? Who rocks my baby to sleep singing the same Elton John songs he sang to me?
Yep, that’s my Dad.
Now, let’s talk about my Hubby. He hates when I brag about him, so I’ll keep it short. But my husband is also a great definition of “showing up.”
Here’s an example. When we moved to Chicago, we had my daughter about two months later. That meant my husband was only two months into a brand new, stressful job.
He was working a lot of hours, but never once did he miss something important to me or my daughter. From taking tearful phone calls when I was sleep deprived, to coming to my lactation consults even though he clearly didn’t have the “equipment” to help, to coming to every early pediatrician appointment, he showed me early and often that he was a great Dad and parenting partner. He’s been the same way ever since.
He’s also a fantastic husband. From spending time together, to helping me when I’m stressed out at work, to making me laugh when I need it, he shows me that I’m a top priority in his life.
I know that I’m lucky to have a Dad and husband that both show up for me like they do. I’m also lucky to have my FIT4MOM Village that shows up for me as well—whether it is offering to bring my holed up family some soup and a humidifier when we’re sick, or listening to me vent at Strides about that one time a woman thought I was homeless at a Wal-Mart (true story).
Happy Father’s Day to my Dad, my husband, and all the wonderful men out there. And thank you also to all of those people that show up for us Moms on a daily basis (fathers or not)—life would be a lot more difficult without you.